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romance ecards

About this category

Where would we be without romance? Probably living less dramatic lives with more compatible people and much more realistic expectations. The only reason our range of Romantic wrongcards exists is because when people start to get themselves into a romantic mood, all good judgment evaporates. And that's where we come in. So if you are going all dewy-eyed and gaga about a certain special somebody then you might as well kick-off the relationship with a Greeting Card that is wrong. Because it's always good to scale back their estimation of you and get them used to feeling a little disappointed. It's only fair. Subcategories of our Romance Cards include: flirting cards, valentines day cards and, hopefully if you make it this far, cards for anniversaries.

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Most recent romance card
I'm not half as sexually adventurous as Mr Sock.

not half so adventurous (flirting)

May 9th is National Lost Sock Memorial Day. I believe that every washing machine manufactured after 1963 was designed to eat precisely one sock per month, just to keep everybody in the consumer world a little off-balance. So where do all the socks go? They're sacrificed, with noble intent, for our collective unease. It's a religion I'm starting. And, of course, I'll be taking donations...
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We should get together and have sex sometime. Im getting to be quite good at it, by practicing on things etc.

practically perfectly practicing (flirting)

Today's card is a rehash Wednesday flirting card which means it's probably Not Safe For Work (whatever that means) though it CAN be useful if you'd like to flirt with someone today. It will also make you more popular - every time I send it to a woman she writes back and tells me how much she just wants to be my friend, which obviously is very sweet and quite complimentary.
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We know that Sigmund Freud never got to the bottom of the question 'what is it that women really want?' because his final work was not a volume of cupcake recipes.

cupcakes (romance)

Romance. It can't be avoided. It has all the sad inevitability of scabies. And what is romance, anyway? On the one hand, you say you don't like someone at work but when their house burns down suddenly I'm the bad guy. And some men grow up eating crayons. Love is not about taking away a man's crayons. What is Romance? Do I put my elbows on the table anymore? No I don't. So there.
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Happy valentines day. This is a picture of an earwig. I am the best.

picture of an earwig (valentines)

On Wednesdays I post an older card then I change the world. I believe we can all change the world, we just need love in our hearts. And seven billion dollars for research and development, and a basement full of kidnapped MIT kids to assemble the first batch of self-replicating robot slave spiders. Changing the world also requires pragmatism.
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Happy Valentines Day, etc. I honestly bought you chocolate but can no longer find it and am now operating under the theory that it was eaten by raptors.

raptors (valentines)

Some say that Valentines Day is a commercialized confidence trick played on lovers, a cloying manufactured holiday, a manipulative marketing mechanism. But me? I only worry about two things. One, that if you don't buy someone chocolate right now, your entire relationship will crumble to pieces. And two, that raptors may not be as extinct as "the authorities" claim.
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Love is like a rhinoceros with a saddle in the sense that if a pithy ecard with an obscure simile is somehow applicable to your relationship then you should both sit down and, over a nice cup of tea, work out what it is you are both doing wrong.

recursive rhinoceros (romance)

"Love is like a rhinoceros wearing a saddle..." Sometimes I'm on fire, and I don't mean when I'm playing with kerosene and a lighter. My doctor says it's because I have a better grasp of reality than most. He stops by occasionally and counsels me and I'm helping him work through some issues with being dead and invisible to his loved ones. Share this card, it has good advice.
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Here is your Valentines Day card. NOW can you make me a sandwich?

subliminal (valentines)

Gentlemen, bad news: Valentines Day is gonna happen any second now. Ladies, yay, you're about to receive a lot of Hallmark nonsense and a bunch of chocolate that you know in your heart is going to go straight to your hips. Puppies? For you, nothing changes, you're still the best things on the planet and I wish there were more of you.
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I want to make sweet love to you like an anteater.

sweet anteater lover (flirting)

Anteaters were once thought to be related to aardvarks but they turned out to be related to sloths and armadillos. I have never seem an anteater but I've seen several wombats. Anteaters aren't related to wombats but I don't see any reason why they wouldn't get along. Today's re-hash Wednesday card is dedicated to any anteater reading this.
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I can tell that I love you by the way I like to make you feel guilty about bullshit.

guilty (romance)

Love makes us great! Example: if Lance Armstrong hadn't been so in love with fame and money he wouldn't have frauded his way to a 100+ million dollar fortune. See? That's not logic, that's romance! Like Lance I'm a wildly romantic person too, though it's tempered with a sensible streak of feminism so when on a date I let the chick buy my meal. I also haven't cried on Oprah yet but I'll get to that.
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About Wrongcards

Wrongcards offering free, funny ecards that are wrong for every occasion, and is possibly the most curious greeting card site on the web. Here you will find cards with a unique freshness and originality, which have been lovingly inked on fresh parchment by an emotionally mature artist committed only to the causes of good taste and judgment. Find out more about us.

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But we'd like to mention that buying our stuff will not make you cool: you are already cool. You don't need to impress your friends: we're already impressed. With that disclaimer out of the way, we do sell packs of cool wrong postcards over at Amazon. They're not very suitable to send to people but that's kind of the idea here.

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