A Valentines Day Message to Each and Every One of You
Valentines Day is Nigh and men across the western world are beginning to feel oppressed with the sullen obligation to manifest a grand romantic gesture. It's not right and it's not fair, but life is filled with injustice, and we are all laden with burdens to be otherwise than who we truly are. In this case, it is the obligation to be romantic - but things might be far worse.
We could be required to sacrifice virgins on blood stained altars with shards of obsidian. By the way I tried it once in the spirit of anthropological inquiry but found that girls just don't have the heart for this kind of historical experimentation. This is why women are awful at writing history. They have no natural feel for it, possibly because they are too sensible and responsible. Or self-absorbed. Everything becomes about
them and
their contribution. And everything they write makes it sound like men invented all the worst ideas in history - like St Valentines Day, for instance - which was clearly not a man's idea.
But we'll send them their St Valentines Day cards and be grateful. After all, they're the keepers of the secret of where our stuff is when it mysteriously disappears from where we carefully left it on the floor. It's all just part of the rich tapestry of modern life.
